What if My Spouse And I Want to Get Back Together?

Perhaps you or your spouse were trigger-happy after an ugly fight and one of you filed for divorce, and are now regretting it. Or perhaps you or your spouse were determined to get a divorce, but midway through the process you decided it was better to give it another try.

The reality of divorce can be pretty ugly. The parties may do a pros/cons of what they would be gaining/losing should they decide to stay married or get a divorce. Depending on the length of the marriage and the ages of the parties and the children, it may often make more economic sense to stay married.

If you are considering reconciling with your spouse, one recommendation would be that you obtain a post-nuptial agreement with your spouse. A post-nuptial agreement is essentially a pre-nuptial agreement, but after you are married. The incentive for signing is that the parties would stay married. In a post-nup, the parties could decide issues regarding maintenance and property so that if they end up divorcing several years later, they could have a better idea of what to expect when assets are divided.

The other advice we would give is that, instead of dismissing it right away, you allow us to put the case on the reconciliation calendar for 6 months to a year. In other words, the court is put on notice that you and your spouse are attempting to reconcile and want some time to figure it out before dismissing the entire case. That way, if reconciliation fails, you don’t have to spend money to re-file the case again.

In whatever scenario you choose, if you ultimately want to dismiss the case, you may have to pay your spouse’s costs that he or she may have incurred in filing his/her appearance. However, if you and your spouse are in agreement, you can decide to waive costs. Ultimately, reconciliation cases are happy endings for divorce lawyers and judges. We don’t see a lot of them, but we are optimistic that the reconciliation will be a success.

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